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Tag: self-care

What is Self Care and Why do you Need It?

a gas gauge on empty

“Exactly how long has this light been on in your car?” The text came shortly after my husband had pulled out of the driveway to run to the grocery store. “Which one?” I replied.  

While he was referring to the low fuel light (long enough that I would need to get gas soon but recent enough that the grocery trip should be fine), he might have just as easily been referring to my check engine light or my tire pressure light, both of which had come on that morning.

Thankfully, my husband is much better at recognizing a potential hazard and got the engine tested (nothing serious) and put some air in my tires…while he was also filling the tank.

While I like to think of myself as a fairly practical person, it turns out when it comes to my car, I live in a fantasy world where lights mean nothing and give no reason for alarm. But those lights are warnings, letting me know that if something doesn’t change, I’m headed for an unexpected pit stop.

Many of us are living life with warning lights going off every morning as well– they usually sound like, “I can’t study right now, I’m too busy.” “I’m too swamped to take a break.” “I’ll just grab whatever fast food I can eat quickly while I head to the next thing.” “Hobbies? I don’t even know how to get Sunday’s service ready, never mind taking time to do something fun!” 

The truth is, our warning lights are blaring and if we don’t recognize the need for a change, we may end up watching our ministry break down, along with our relationships.

On a recent episode of the podcast, Jimbob spoke with our good friend, Frank Lewis, about self care for the Replant Pastor.  Frank brought up some great points about the benefits of keeping our spiritual, physical, and mental health a priority doing the gritty and glorious work of replanting churches. 

When we think of “self care,” we may be tempted to think that it is selfish or self-indulgent.  But self care is actually defined by the World Health Organization as “the ability of individuals, families, and communities to promote health, prevent disease, maintain health, and cope with illness and disability with or without the support of a health worker.” Essentially, self care is anything we do so that we can be healthy, do our jobs, help and care for others, and do all the things we need to and want to accomplish in a day.

Types of Self Care

stones stacked on top of each other reading mind, body, and soul with the sun setting behind them

When we picture self care, we tend to limit it to spa treatments or solo activities, like reading or journaling.  But there are countless ways to practice self care, and each of them can have benefits far beyond a 60 minute massage.  

Physical Self Care

When we practice physical self care, we include eating healthier, exercising, and better sleeping habits.  Perhaps the best reason for physical health is the need to be physically ready for the challenges replanters face each day.  Many of you are bi-vocational, working two full-time jobs. Without discipline, it is easy to fall into a lifestyle of fast food and fatigue.  Have you ever said, “I’m too tired to even go to sleep!” You may have stayed up later than you needed to, resulting in you feeling even worse the next day– and that lack of sleep will catch up to you, resulting in exhaustion and possibly even serious health effects. Eating well and taking care of your body enables you to keep giving your best in all facets of your ministry.

I recently started going to the gym on my lunch break four times per week.  It isn’t much, just 30 minutes of cardio activity, but I feel better on the days I do it.  I am better prepared for the tasks I need to accomplish.  It also keeps me away from fast food and sitting in my car on my lunch break, which usually leaves me feeling sluggish for the rest of the day. Even as little as 30 minutes can have a profound impact on your overall health and well being.

Spiritual Self Care

We must also seek spiritual self care.  The need for us to be spiritually healthy cannot be overstated.  We are in a battle for people’s souls.  To neglect our spiritual health can have eternal consequences.  So often, pastors will study scripture for their sermon preparation and for their congregation’s needs, but they will fail to practice spiritual self care.  Reading devotions, meditating on scripture, and praying to God are necessary disciplines to care for your own soul as you do for the souls of others.

In the book, Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life, Donald Whitney lays out some other disciplines that we often fail to incorporate into our lives. For example, when was the last time you practiced solitude? Remember when Jesus was ministering to communities and healing people, he would often retreat to be by himself for a while and simply pray. Jesus needed this time to gain energy and focus on his mission by spending time with the Father. Don’t neglect important tools like this in your personal life. 

Emotional Self-Care

Another self care tool we need is emotional self care.  Our emotions are like a gas tank– without constant refilling, we will eventually run out.  As an old saying goes, “you can’t fill from an empty cup.” When we run on empty, we have nothing left for those who need us. 

I distinctly remember one season of ministry where I was just emotionally drained.  Unfortunately, I had given so much to others that when my own child came to me with a very real emotional need, I was too depleted to empathize or help. Emotional self care is just as important as physical and spiritual self care.  Caring for your emotions can include both social and individual care.  Spending time with friends who lift you up and support you can refill your tank in much the same way taking time away for a vacation or sabbatical can.

Mental Self-Care

In addition to your physical body, your spiritual soul, and your emotions, your brain needs care, too.  Mental self care is so important to a pastor.  When you spend so much time in study and cerebral activities, exercising your brain in new ways helps to keep it stimulated and engaged.  Mental self care can include artistic endeavors like writing poetry or music, or working with your physical hands in woodworking or other hands-on hobbies. Self care for your brain can even mean learning a new activity or a new language.

I’ve often heard that if you work with your hands a lot, take a break by resting with your mind (like reading). Or if you work with your mind a lot, take a break by resting with your hands (working on a project). These small steps help more than we realize.

a man at a desk with hands reaching out with obligations and no time for self care

Barriers to Self Care

Often, when we talk about self care, we can see the benefit, and we understand the need.  Unfortunately, we still can’t seem to find the time for it.  “I’m too busy for another thing on my schedule, even self care!” Might I offer this truth?  

We can’t afford NOT to practice self care. In fact, self care may need to be penciled into the calendar FIRST.

Let’s go back to my car– if I had continued to allow my car to run without gas, on tires that were going flat, with an engine light that was alerting me to a specific issue, how much longer could my car run?  How long until I was on the side of the road, experiencing a breakdown?

Now think of yourself.  How long can you go without self care before you experience a breakdown? I’m guessing it’s far less time than you think.  Often the symptoms of a breakdown show up before we actually come to a complete stop.  Symptoms that look like arguments with your spouse, impatience with your coworkers, irritation with your children, physical illness… You need to practice self care before you self-destruct.

The quickest way to make self care a priority is to pencil it in.  Literally, pencil self care into your calendar.  Make it a habit in your life that you refuse to break.  I have a friend who takes a pottery class every Tuesday night.  That night is as important to her as Sunday morning.  She refuses to miss it.  She recognizes the importance it has to her and the difference it makes in her life. In the same way, you must pencil in time with God, your friends, your family, and yourself.  

A book we have used already in other blogs is Replenish by Lance Witt. In the book, Witt has a well-known quote that sums this topic up quite well. He says, “Never lose sight of the fact that the box (your ministry) is not as valuable as the gift (Jesus). And the only reason the box exists is to deliver the gift. You have dedicated your life to the gift, not to the box.”

 

EP 185 SELF CARE FOR THE PASTOR/REPLANTER w/ FRANK LEWIS

Replant Bootcamp
Replant Bootcamp
EP 185 SELF CARE FOR THE PASTOR/REPLANTER w/ FRANK LEWIS
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Welcome to the Replant Bootcamp, a podcast for pastors and church leaders who are looking to replant and revitalize churches. Today’s episode has the guys discussing self-care for pastors, a topic that is often overlooked but extremely important. Our guest for today’s episode is Frank Lewis, who multiple years of experience in pastoral ministry.

 

One of the main points that Frank emphasizes is the need for pastors to prioritize their spiritual devotions. This means spending time in prayer, reading the Bible, and seeking God’s guidance. As pastors, it’s easy to get caught up in the demands of ministry and neglect our personal spiritual growth. However, Frank reminds us that our ministry flows out of our relationship with God, and we need to make that relationship a priority.

 

Another important aspect of self-care for pastors is taking care of our physical health. Frank encourages pastors to make time for regular exercise and to eat a healthy diet. Exercise not only benefits our physical health but can also improve our mental health and reduce stress.Similarly, eating a healthy diet can give us the energy we need to carry out our ministry and improve our overall well-being.

 

Finally, Frank emphasizes the importance of developing a circle of friends who are also pastors. This provides a support system of people who understand the unique challenges and stresses that come with pastoral ministry. These friends can offer encouragement, accountability, and a safe space to share struggles and challenges.

 

Thank you, Frank Lewis, for sharing your insights and wisdom with us today. And thank you to our listeners for tuning in to the Replant Bootcamp.

 

 

 

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EP 172 – NEW YEAR, NEW FOCUS

Replant Bootcamp
Replant Bootcamp
EP 172 - NEW YEAR, NEW FOCUS
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Hey there Bootcampers! We’re back from our Holiday break, we’re jumping right in and getting down to business and discussing the important awareness of how you live your life as a leader. Our good friends at First Coast Churches hosted an annual meeting where Lance Witt presented some great info on how Pastors can move beyond the grind.

Every leader lives on two stages:

  • The front stage-everyone sees
  • The backstage-clutter, curtains, chaos not many ever see this

The challenge many Pastors face is staying connected to and loving Jesus, the Shepherd, more than the sheep business. How do you do that? Witt, provides some helpful framework for us from Psalm 23

  • Create space and time for unhurried time with God
  • Pay attention to what you are paying attention to
  • Let rest – restore you
  • Grab your calendar by the throat-don’t let life or ministry plan you-proactively plan with the Lord’s guidance.
  • Engage good self-care rather than self-medication
  • Practice a Sabbath (you need a day off)
  • Let your time with God give embolden you with courage
  • Receive the voice of God’s blessing

There’s a whole lot more packed into this EP, check it out!

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EP 132 – STAYING HEALTHY AS A REPLANT PASTOR

Replant Bootcamp
Replant Bootcamp
EP 132 - STAYING HEALTHY AS A REPLANT PASTOR
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The Bootcamp boys continue the ATL Bootcamp series and are joined by none other than Pilot Mountain’s own, Walker Armstrong. Walker serves as the AMS Leader for the Pilot Mountain Association and is one of the leaders who helped create the Replant Practitioner Training. Listen in as they discuss what it takes to be healthy as a Pastor serving in a local church.

Staying Healthy is challenging when:

  • Pastors/Leaders become isolated and alone
  • When they persist in the hard work of ministry without any breaks
  • When they don’t have a coach, mentor or friend
  • When they ignore their own health (physical, spiritual, financial etc.)

What can be done to address pastor health?

  • Develop a regular practice of “check-ups” and “Check-in’s”
  • Join a pastors cohort group-where proactive care and focus are given to members
  • Develop a list of conversational questions aimed at discussing the issues of life, ministry and spiritual growth

Great quote from the episode: “You are only as sick as your secrets.”

Guys, don’t Pastor alone, connect with other Pastors. your Associational Leader or check in with us here at the Bootcamp. Drop us a line, send an email reach out today.

Need help? Pastoral Care Line: 1-844-PASTOR1 is a free, confidential, dedicated help line for pastors. Trained, professional counselors are available every day from 8 a.m. – 10 p.m. (ET). Confidentiality is ensured by Focus on the Family.

The Practical Shepherding Pastor’s Cohort

Replanter’s Wife Facebook Group

Checkout Walker’s writing here: WalkerArmstrongwrites.com

 

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