Is it possible to balance the demands of our ministry and the needs of our family? How can we walk the tightrope between being “on-call” for our congregation’s needs and getting rest to be able to meet those needs? If we work 60+ hour weeks, what is left to give our family?
Bryan Dyson, the former CEO of Coca-Cola, once gave a commencement speech in which he made this analogy:
“Imagine life as a game in which you juggle some five balls in the air. You name them work, family, health, friends, and spirit and you’re keeping all of these in the air. You will soon understand that ‘work’ is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. But the other four balls – family, health, friends and spirit – are made of glass. If you drop one of these, they will be irrevocably scuffed, marked, nicked, damaged or even shattered. They will never be the same. You must understand that and strive for balance in your life.”
In my own life, I have labeled the balls somewhat differently, but I certainly agree with and embrace the analogy.
Replant pastors are juggling so many balls, it may feel nearly impossible to label which ones are glass and which are rubber. But those labels may reveal the difference between a successful juggling act and a floor full of broken glass.
While identifying the balls can be helpful, most can agree the hardest part of juggling isn’t knowing the type of balls in the air. It’s keeping them all in the air. While you can drop some of them, the show is certainly more successful if you can keep them going.
As pastors, there is often a feeling of immediacy to every demand– it can all feel like there is an emergency around every corner. “I have to help this person, be at that hospital, take care of this facility need, get that bill paid, go to this event, get to that game…” The list is endless. And that’s just it– there is always something else to do!
So how do pastors learn how to juggle?
On Episode 116 of the podcast, JimBob discussed the answer to this very question and came up with eight ways to balance family and ministry.
The truth is, there will be times in ministry when you have to drop the balls. You aren’t Superman, but more than that, you aren’t God. You can’t juggle the needs of your entire congregation, your facility, your other job (if you have one), your community, and your family without occasionally needing to put down everything and focus on just carrying the very fragile, very important glass ball until you are ready to start juggling again.
Church will always take as much as you are willing to give. Church work can be a ravenous beast, and you can never feed it “enough.” There will always be work that needs to be done and ministry that needs to be led. But there are very rarely true emergencies that require your immediate attention, even though it may feel like it. (Marriages don’t end at 11:30 pm when they finally call you for help– that marriage will last until tomorrow when you can get to them.) You must be willing to prioritize your time and set boundaries that allow you to keep your family- and your sanity- intact.
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