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Defining Who You Are By What You Do– And Why it Matters

Three dangers to avoid when defining ourselves

One of my least favorite questions is, “What do you do?”  I never know how to answer it– because what I do is so very little of who I am.  Defining myself by my profession as a veterinary technician feels so inadequate.  I am also a wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, worship leader, and writer.  For my husband, a pastor, the question of “What do you do?” can be even more complicated.  

While on vacation a few years ago, we shared a dinner table with a great couple from Colorado.  Our conversation ranged from our favorite places to vacation (cruising) to recent world events (unsettling as much then as now)  to the joys and challenges of raising children (theirs were small, ours were grown).  We were having a wonderful time and were really enjoying the company.  Then at one point, the husband said, “Man, it’s so nice to be seated with some ‘normal’ people– the last time we sat with someone who was a pastor and they were so weird!  So what do you guys do?” (Talk about awkward– my husband said, “Um, I’m a revitalization specialist.” A fancy way of saying Replant Pastor, I suppose– though there is a difference.  We eventually told them he was a pastor once they realized we were super weird regardless of his profession.)

As leaders in our churches, we are highly aware of what we “do.”  Ministry is our job– even as some of us hold down other jobs as bi-vocational leaders. So often, we are tasked with thinking of our profession as separate from who we are.  But there is a danger in separating who we are from what we do– just as there is a danger in overlapping the two.  While they are related, they are not interchangeable.

In chapter 10 of his book, Wisdom in Leadership- the How and Why of Leading the People you Serve, author Craig Hamilton gives us three main dangers of seeing what we do as who we are, or dismissing the two as completely and totally different. “At either extreme,” he writes, “we risk damaging both our ministries and our hearts.”

  • Danger #1: Trying to separate the two can lead to thinking that who God wants you to be has no impact on what God wants you to do

This danger typically shows up when we think of our ministry as “just a job.” When you forget that you are called to shepherd your people and to serve them and instead view them as employees, or worse, obstacles to “getting the job done,” you’ve begun to think of pastoring as what you do.  You preach, minister, counsel, and organize, but the heart is missing from it.  Sometimes this happens because you’ve been hurt in your ministry.  There is a temptation to protect your heart by cutting it off and doing ministry in a vacuum.  

But there is a problem with that approach– without your heart attached to your ministry, you are at risk of moral failure. Your heart becomes numb to the potential pitfalls around you, and “you begin to think that moral failings and secret sins don’t matter and won’t affect what God wants you to do in ministry.” A long term separation of your calling and your heart will result in your ministry being taken away because of your own moral failure or because your ministry is simply ineffective. A practical step to ensure you don’t fall into this danger is to have an accountability partner.  We are all fallible and we live in a fallen world.  When our heart is at risk, we need to have someone who can speak a Word to us and protect us from falling.  This isn’t just a friend– this is someone who you can be your authentic self around AND who can give you Godly, spirit-filled advice that you accept and receive.

  • Danger #2: Trying to separate the two can also lead to thinking that what God wants you to do is more important than who God wants you to be.

Just as thinking of ministry as “business” is dangerous, so too, is treating ministry as “busy-ness.” Often pastors are so busy trying to do it all, they begin to struggle to pastor themselves.  Hamilton writes, “when what God wants you to do becomes more important than who God wants you to be, one of the first things to drop off the radar is your relationship with God.” It is so easy for a pastor to have his bible open every day planning sermons, bible studies, small group materials, and counseling others, only to realize that he hasn’t opened it for his own nourishment in weeks.  This results in an atrophied heart with a weariness that leads to burnout.  “I’ve got to get this job done,” becomes the mantra.  People feel like burdens, not disciples.  Ministry feels like duty, not joy.  Long term, this separation will result in you walking away from God’s calling, overworked and overburdened. Preventing this danger requires time and care be taken for your own spiritual health.  Sometimes that means a sabbatical, perhaps getting away from it all for a season so that you can come back refreshed and re-energized for the work ahead. The Shepherd’s House may be available to you for this time, or you may be able to find time at a local retreat.  If you can’t afford a sabbatical, perhaps making sure you have a day of rest built into your schedule will give you the rest you need.  Spend time with God outside of your normal schedule and your normal study.  

  • Danger #3: When you see who you are and what you do as completely overlapping, you can begin to think that what God has called you to do is who God has called you to be.

This danger appears when we begin to see our value and worth tied up in what we do.  The success, or failure, of our ministry overlaps into how we see ourselves.  If our ministry is thriving, we feel Successful, which often leads to pride and arrogance.  On the flip side, if our ministry is struggling, we feel like we have failed, often leading to despair.  Instead of defining ourselves in terms of what God has done,  we define our worth in terms of our own abilities.  

Long term, this danger results in manic swings of highs and lows based on the measurable results of our work. But so much of what we do is immeasurable. Can we count the number of lives touched by our ministries the way we can count people in pews?  Certainly not.  We never know where we are in someone’s spiritual journey (1 Cor 3:6-8). We also never know how God will use our church to reach our community in the future.  Basing our success (or our failure) on the number of people in the sanctuary or the number of views our livestream has will always make us more dependent on our own power than on God working through us.  

We are easily susceptible to this danger when we do not have reminders of our worth in Jesus Christ.  When we see ourselves as the world sees us, we are missing a key component of our relationship with God.  He isn’t defining our ministry by our metrics. He is defining us as loved, adopted sons and daughters and heirs not only to His kingdom, but also to His suffering. As chosen disciples who are filled with his Spirit and are able to do more than we can possibly imagine through Him.  Take time to read these and other specific scriptures that define your value according to God. Write them out and memorize them. When you feel the burden of failure or the joy of success, remember to draw back to God’s definition of who you are in Him.  

When we confuse what we do with who we are, we run into dangerous territory and our ministry suffers.  Jesus reminds us in Luke 10:19-20 that we should not rejoice in what we can do, but instead what He can do through us. What we do flows out of who we are– God has already redeemed us.  We are beloved children of God, heirs to His kingdom.  He doesn’t need us, but He chooses to use us to fulfill His purpose, that all should know Him. When we feel like our ministry is “just a job,” or we get so busy doing ministry that we forget to check in with God, or when we define ourselves by the success or failure of our ministry, we fail to remember that God is doing something around us. In your ministry right now, are you dealing with a situation where you aren’t sure what God is doing through you?  Remember, as Bob said in the podcast, that first God does something around us, then He works on us through the situation, so that He can work in us before He ever works through us. 

This is what He does, because of who He is.

Which of these dangers do you fall into most?  What are some steps you can practically implement to make sure you don’t allow these short-term dangers to become long-term failings? Email us at replantbootcamp@gmail.com or contact us through social media to let us know!  

 

EP 158 – AVOIDING PRAGMATIC PITFALLS – LEADERSHIP WISDOM PT.1 –

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EP 158 - AVOIDING PRAGMATIC PITFALLS - LEADERSHIP WISDOM PT.1 -
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Hey Bootcampers welcome back! Just a reminder that we’d love to see you in Louisville at the Am I a Replanter? October 27-28, 2022. You can register online here 

Let’s get to it, we’ll start by defining pragmatism.

Hamilton says that what he means by “pragmatic is assessing a plan or belief in terms of its practical success. Pragmatism is a way of assessing problems and situations based on their immediate practical consequences rather than on abstract or ideological concerns. In other words, what’s right works.”

Before you toss out pragmatism understand that in it, there’s both good and bad.  The challenging part of buying totally into pragmatism is that it may work in the short run-but often it doesn’t pay off in the long run. Most of the time, if you buy into an overly pragmatic decision-making style you’ll begin to experience unintended consequences.

Sit back, lean in, and listen to some of the helpful wisdom in this EP.

 

If you’re looking for help for your website, get with our great sponsor, One Eighty Digital. They can help you develop your web presence in a way that communicates who you are to the community in which your church is located.

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EP 151 – BRAIN SCIENCE AND CHANGE RESISTANCE

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EP 151 - BRAIN SCIENCE AND CHANGE RESISTANCE
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Why is change so difficult to accept? Especially by churches who are steeped in decline? We may need to consider how we’re wired up and what we think. In this episode the guys talk about brain science, group think and what we need to know about it all as Replanters.  Dial it up, sit right down and let us know what you think.

What do we need to know about Brain

  • Your experiences shape your brain and your reactions
  • Habits and Responses become hardwired into your brain
  • Your brain has a natural negativity (protective) bias
  • Thinking is contagious
  • Remapping a thought pattern is possible but difficult, time consuming

Church Application for Replanters/Revitalizers

  • Some congregants are fearful
  • Church traditions are hardwired in the congregations collective conscience and not easily disrupted
  • Congregations are hyper vigilant regarding potential threats to their existence
  • Remaining Members in a deeply declined church will likely have the same mindset
  • Changing the existing group-think is possible but will be difficult and time consuming

It’s not too late to sign up for the Replant Summit in ATL, we’d love to see you there!

 

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EP 127 – CHARACTERISTICS OF A GODLY LEADER – RESPECT

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EP 127 - CHARACTERISTICS OF A GODLY LEADER - RESPECT
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The boys are back at it here at the Bootcamp! Today we’re talking about RESPECT and how important that is to leading effectively as a godly leader in a Replant or Revitalization. Jump in, give a listen and drop us a line or comment with your thoughts, experience or question.

  • Recap: Five key factors of character are
    • Humility – (covered)
    • Goodwill – (covered)
    • Empathy – (covered)
    • Respect – TODAY
    • Integrity
  • Five imperatives of respect
    • Honor others
    • Open communication
    • Disagree productively
    • Help others win
    • Express gratitude

You need a respectable website and we’ve got a great sponsor who can help! Call our friends at One Eighty Digital and they’ll get you up and running quick.

Fun Food Links

Drago’s Seafood Restaurant

New Orleans Food and Spirits

 

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EP 121 – CHARACTERISTICS OF A GODLY LEADER : HUMILITY

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EP 121 - CHARACTERISTICS OF A GODLY LEADER : HUMILITY
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They bootcamp boys are back talking about the importance of being a godly leader. You’ve probably heard the refrain-everything rises and falls on Leadership-we agree but it’s not always the kind of leadership one might think. We take time to talk about the characteristics of a godly leader which we believe are primary in helping a church, which needs to be Replanted or Revitalized, move forward.

5 Characteristics of Godly Leadership

  • Humility
  • Integrity
  • Respect
  • Empathy
  • Goodwill

Remember – the change a church needs is first spiritual before it is strategic or structural.

What are the specific characteristics of a humble godly leader?

  • Self-awareness
  • Healthy biblical identity
  • Holy contentment
  • God-grounded confidence
  • Promotion and edification of others

Book recommendations:

Facing the Leviathan  by Mark Sayers

The Posture of a Godly Leader by Mark Hallock

Stay tuned as we continue to explore the characteristics of a godly leader in future episodes.

Don’t miss this great event. Am I a Replanter? February 18-19, 2022 in New Orleans at the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary. Registration closes this week.

Get your website in order by calling our friends at One Eighty Digital, they can get you up and running with their expertise. Tell them the boys at the Bootcamp sent you.

 

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#112 – FRIENDSHIPS IN A REPLANT

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#112 - FRIENDSHIPS IN A REPLANT
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The Bootcamp boys are back! Jimbo is fired up for the “battle of the boot” game between LSU and Arkansas. The bet is on-will Jimbo wear the Hog Hat or will Bob wear the Pajama top? We’ll see.

Today the guys answer a question from one of Listeners about how to manage boundaries and friendships with members in our congregation. Listen in as we break it down and talk about all the ins and outs of navigating the issues of friendships within a Replant.

Here are some of the highlights

  • Be wise and cautions toward the person who pursues you constantly-just after you arrive at your church.
  • Be friendly with everyone, be friends with a few. (Proverbs 18:14)
  • Consider the difference between friends and acquaintances.
  • Note: you may not really know how deep the friendship is until you have experienced conflict in the friendship
  • You may have to deal with “possessiveness” (directly or indirectly)
  • Addressing spiritual growth, sin or other issues with a friend/congregant can be difficult.
  • During difficult seasons in the relationship you will have to decide: am I their pastor or their friend-it’s not easy.
  • Friendships with other Pastors are important critical-get connected to a Pastor in your area.

Join us in NOLA for this great event!

Am I a Replanter, Feb 18-19, 2021 New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary

Don’t shank it to the left or right-get your website in order. You can do that by calling One Eighty Digital, they can get you up and running with their expertise. Tell them the boys at the Bootcamp sent you.

Drop us a line, a question and a comment, we’d love to hear from you!

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EP 111 – THE SYNERGIST AND LEADERSHIP JUDO

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EP 111 - THE SYNERGIST AND LEADERSHIP JUDO
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We’re back and wrapping up the Leadership Judo series, this time talking about the Synergist Leadership Style. This style is an important one and there are some unique dynamics in understanding, working with and accepting the contributions of a Synergist.

Here are some of the key highlights

  • Ask a Synergist to help you get people on board with an idea or initiative-they have great people skills and can build unity among team members.
  • Conflict often occurs between a Synergist and the Operator. The Operator can be viewed as too blunt and down to business by the Synergist who the operator thinks just focuses on talking and doing nothing of real substance.
  • The Synergist may default to inaction when the team or staff fails to develop consensus-it is important to help them move forward recognizing that you’ll never have 100% of your people/team/congregation on board.
  • They Synergist is a great relationship builder and can get a good read on people-connect with them to understand what might be taking place within your congregation.

We’d love to hear your thoughts-drop us a line, a text or call into the bootcamp hotline and leave us your questions or comments.

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EPISODE #110 – Processors and Leadership Judo

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EPISODE #110 - Processors and Leadership Judo
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This week the guys continue their series in Leadership Judo through the VOPS leadership styles by Les McKeown in his book The Synergist

  • THE MIND OF A PROCESSOR (quotes are from ch. 4 of The Synergist)
  • Processors feel compelled to bring order to all they see. They’re easy to recognize not just in business, but in every walk of life—Processors color-code their wardrobes, arrange their books by subject, and know the replacement date for their water filters.”
  • “So, unlike the Operator—who’s first thought when faced with a task is ‘Let’s get started’—a Processor’s first through is ‘What system or process can I put in place to ensure that this task is performed consistently in the future?’”
  • “Allied to the Processor’s need for order is their aversion to risk. . . The processor’s risk-aversion often manifests itself as a resistance to change.”
  • For a processor, data is all important. More precise than experience, more accurate than judgment, data is the fundamental currency in which the Processor trades.”
  • “It is important for Processors that whatever they do, the do it right. . . While this is usually a good thing—bringing precision is why the Processor is there after all—on occasion Processors can be so preoccupied with ‘doing the thing right’ at the expense of ‘doing the right thing that they lose sight of the organization’s overall business needs.”
  • Processor Strengths
    • Consistency and repeatability
    • Scalability
    • Accuracy
    • Control
    • Clinical perspective
  • Processor Weaknesses
    • Invariable pace
    • Resistance to risk and change
    • Overanalysis
    • Default to no

LEADERSHIP JUDO PRINCIPLES

  • Respect their principles
    • Be punctual – schedule in advance and show up on time and end at or before the scheduled end time
    • Be prepared – have data, know what you are talking about or asking
    • Be precise – don’t exaggerate or be ambiguous
      • Processors love the integrity of data and are easily frustrated with ambiguity or exaggeration. “Frequent use of broad sweeping statements will eventually, in the eyes of the processor, undermine the credibility of the people making those statements.”
  • Set precise goals (with deadlines)
    • Set realistic deadlines for new initiatives (V – 7x – O – 7x – P)
    • Be overly specific about what you want
    • Avoid informal chats as meetings
  • Be quick to listen
    • Many processors do not feel like they usually get a fair hearing of their perspective.
    • Don’t multitask – put your phone on silent and give them your undivided attention.
  • Show appreciation for their work and their perspective
    • Processors are often unsung heroes
      • And sometimes unnecessarily viewed as villains to Visionaries and Operators
  • Challenge constructively
    • Don’t challenge them with anecdotes – challenge with data
    • Ask clarifying questions about the data to gain a better understanding
    • Pushed into a corner to choose you, the org, or the data the Processor will choose the data
  • Build trust with them
    • Trust comes from credibility
    • Be consistent with your walk and talk

LINKS

The Synergist by Les McKeown

Free leadership style quiz CLICK HERE

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EPISODE #109 – Leadership Judo with Operators

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EPISODE #109 - Leadership Judo with Operators
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This week the boys have been traveling to and fro, encouraging Pastors and Associations on the road in TX, planning some great stuff in Bob’s home town of STL and sampling the local cuisine.  But since you don’t tune in for food alone they get down to another EP on Leadership Judo, discussing the Operator Leadership Style.

Here are some of the highlights of the Operator personalities:

  • Operators have a bias toward action
  • Operators are often strong internal consultants
  • Operators tend to overcommit
  • Operators are hard to find

The guys provide some super secret leadership judo moves to use with Operators who are in your church within the heart of this EP.

Leave us your comments, drop us a question and remember to tell others about the Bootcamp!

LINKS

The Synergist by Les McKeown

Free leadership style quiz CLICK HERE

STL Sandwich, Gioa’s Deli

Sinaloa’s Breakfast Burrito in TX City

The Truth BBQ in Houston TX

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EPISODE #108 – Leadership Judo with Visionary Leaders

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EPISODE #108 - Leadership Judo with Visionary Leaders
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The Bootcamp Bros are back talking about Leadership Judo. What is leadership judo you ask? You can listen to last week’s podcast and get up to speed.

Here’s a quick definition to get you ready for this episode.

Leadership Judo: taking the energy of an opponent and directing it away from harm to a more productive place.

We’re going to get specific over the next few EPs in applying leadership judo to some of the leadership styles we encounter in our churches, businesses and organizations.  Today’s leadership style-The Visionary.

Here are some highlights (check the audio for detail)

When working with or Leading Visionaries

  • Hear them out
  • Ask, don’t tell
  • Be flexible and fun
  • Check in regularly

Are you a visionary?  Concerned your leadership style is creating chaos? Check out the bonus EP for some helpful tips on how to “judo yourself.”

LINKS

Free leadership style quiz CLICK HERE

Bonus episode for Visionary leaders CLICK HERE

Russ Taff and his Bell Buckle Weekend

 

Do some serious Judo on your church website by calling our friends at One Eighty Digital, they can get you up and running with their expertise. Tell them the boys at the Bootcamp sent you.

Drop us a line, a question and a comment, we’d love to hear from you!

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